Letras de Canciones de The Mothers of Invention
Uncle Meat Film Excerpt Part 1
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FZ: We're shooting the uh, title sequence for
Uncle Meat right now, which is the name of the
Mothers of Invention movie that we've been working
on for about three years . . . without too much
success. Don: Boy, we really need a hit single . .
. Just think, I mean, the way the world's going
today . . . with all the problems in it . . . I
think I can actually change the world, because
it's the young people that really need to be
changed, and, and you can really do that through
music and everything . . . This was our last hit
single . . . it was really a bummer, they wouldn't
even play it on the radio . . . Oh, well, gotta
come up with something better than that . . .
1:34
Don: Good evening, this is Biff Debris. Phyllis:
You know . . . it's too much, I know. Don: Coming
to you from the motel. Phyllis: Look at that
monster. Don: Where . . . FZ: Ha ha ha ha!
Phyllis: What are they laughing about? He looks so
beautiful when they laugh . . . Don: That's what
my psychiatrist used to say . . . Phyllis: Twelve
years. It's the same story there with that song, I
don't know what I'm doing, but look, look at the
way he's changing . . . Oh, I remember that in the
shower, the first time with the hamburger. Oh,
that was good . . . But, I don't know, twelve
years marriage, you get tired of the same thing.
But I don't know, I can try it again sometime. Oh,
look there's Minnesota! He was a great guy,
Minnesota Tishman . . . Don: We're coming to the
beginning of a new era Phyllis: He was a nice guy
. . . Don: Don't you feel it coming? Phyllis: He
was, he was okay in this time. He's washed up now,
I heard about it though.
2:20
Ray: What is it you're doing, Mr. Tishman? Carl:
I'm using the chicken to measure it Aynsley: . . .
pool? Phyllis: You know what I used to do? I used
to watch him eat, and while he was eating I would
ask him what he's doing. Haskell Wexler: What the
hell are we doing in this bathroom? FZ: I'm going
to . . . While you stand there and take pictures
of that, I'm gonna tell you the, the plot of the
movie. Alright. Basically what we're going to do,
today, is spend some time around the house while
you meet the people that you're going to be
photographing for the rest of the week . . . and
we discuss some of the absurdities . . . Haskell
Wexler: Absurdities? FZ: Yes, we're just dealing
with the . . . the absurdities of making the movie
in the first place and especially about the
Mothers of Invention . . .
3:20
Guy From Alabama: You wanna have a circle-jerk?
Aynsley: The who? Guy From Alabama: Circle-jerk.
Aynsley: A circle jerk? What's that? Guy From
Alabama: That's where you get everybody around and
bet yer meat and see who can get it the fastest.
Aynsley: Yeah? Guy From Alabama: Yeah, and whoever
wins gets nineteen kegs Aynsley: Nineteen who? Guy
From Alabama: Kegs, you know . . . Aynsley: Cakes
of what? Meredith: Gee Jimmy, that's cool!
Aynsley: Cakes. Cheers. Yeah, anyway. FZ: What
could that possibly mean . . . hmmm, I wonder what
happens if you go like this . . .
3:42
Ray: What is it that you're doing with this? Carl:
I'm using the . . . FZ: You know what I used to
do? I used to watch him eat. And while he was
eating, I would talk to him while he was eating,
and I would ask him what he's doing. And he would
say, "I'm using the chicken to measure
it." Phyllis: Ok . . . Don: Can I borrow your
comb? Phyllis: You know what I used to do? Ray:
What are you doing with that? Phyllis: I used to
watch him eat. Carl: I'm using the chicken to
measure it. Phyllis: You know, you know what I
used to do? I used to watch him eat. And while he
was eating, I would ask him, "What are you
doing?" FZ: Do it again. Ray: Why is he using
a chicken to measure it? Phyllis: And he would
say, "I'm using the chicken to measure
it." What did he mean by that? Ray: . . .
he's using the chicken to measure it Phyllis: Till
this day I don't know what he's talking about . .
. FZ: Do it again. Phyllis: That Tishman. That
Minnesota Tishman . . . What a guy . . .
4:22
Guy From Alabama: Eight inches or less? Aynsley:
Uh . . . eight inches. Guy From Alabama: Eight
inches? Well, I'll get your kind of women, there,
man. Aynsley: You can? Yes, it's cool . . . Guy
From Alabama: Oh, they got some whores there you
wouldn't believe! Meredith: Gee Jimmy, that's
cool! Guy From Alabama: You can just . . . fall
right in. Aynsley: But do they play pool?
4:32
Phyllis: What a guy, what a sense of humour . . .
The way he used to . . . let me get back to that.
FZ: Look at the way he hands that chicken . . .
Aynsley: Do you want another ball? FZ: He had a
way with that chicken . . . Phyllis: He . . . look
at the way he handles that chicken, he had a way .
. . look at the way he holds it, and fondles it,
and he put it right near his privates . . .
Aynsley: But that's cool, still Guy From Alabama:
That's cool, yeah. Aynsley: That's cool, yeah, I
sort of followed the . . . Guy From Alabama: I'm
using the chicken to measure it, though Aynsley:
You were? Guy From Alabama: Yeah. Aynsley: Yeah,
where's the shit . . . or the white dove? Guy From
Alabama: I'm up to my knees in shit, man. Aynsley:
Really. Guy From Alabama: There's all kind of
shit, now about . . . all smokin' shit . . .
5:00
Massimo: And now, we are going to translate:
"This is my left hand." Repeat after me:
"Questa e' la mia mano sinistra." And
now: "This is my right hand." Repeat
after me: "Questa e' la mia mano
destra." Ray: What is it you're doing? Carl:
I'm using the chicken to measure it. Have you ever
used a chicken to measure it? Meredith: Gee Jimmy,
that's cool! Guy From Alabama: I fucked a chicken
. . .
5:25
Don: We're coming to the beginning of a new era
wherein the development of the inner self is the
most important thing. We have to train ourselves.
So that we can improvise on anything: a bird, a
sock, a fuming beaker. This is, this too can be
music. Anything can be music.
FZ: Hello? Yeah, are you busy? Well I was
wondering --this is Frank-- can you come, yeah,
can you come over here and be in our uh, teen-age
movie? Okay, well, I'll tell you what the action
is . . . Phyllis: He's eating. FZ: Ok, he's
eating, you see . . . Don Preston . . . Well, it
depends, mostly it's a hamburger, sometimes, well
he doesn't wanna eat the hamburger, 'cause he's a
vegetarian . . . Okay now, Phyllis is here . . .
Phyllis . . . Phyllis: Who's Phyllis? FZ: No, no,
no, Phyllis is the girl that's the, my assistant
editor on the, on the film . . . Yeah, she used to
be Tom Wilson's secretary . . . Ok . . . You
remember Tom Wilson were gonna run for President?
6:51
Aynsley: You're Tom Wilson? Carl: Yeah. Aynsley:
Yeah? Carl: Then she came out here work on the
Woodstock festival. Ray: What are you doing with
that chicken? Carl: And then uh, then . . . Ray: I
was measuring the ball. Carl: Then Frank hired her
to work on the Mothers movie.
7:00
Phyllis: Hi, I'm Phyllis Altenhaus, and I'm
working with Frank Zappa on his film Uncle Meat,
in Hollywood. I'm a little nervous doing this
'cause it's the first time I'd even been a star in
a film. I originally started working for Frank as
his assistant editor on the film Uncle Meat, and
one day we were sitting around watching the
Festival Hall shots, the rushes, and I saw Don
come on the screen --Don Preston plays the
monster-- and I said, "Frank, look at Don!
He's turning into a monster! I'm gonna
vomit!" FZ: When she sees him turning into a
monster she has to vomit. Phyllis: Frank said,
"That's it, that's the opening of the line,
that, that, I mean, that's the opening of the
picture." I said, "Frank, I can't be in
your picture, first of all, I have such a bad
Brooklyn accent, I'm embarrased by the whole
thing!" And he said, "Don't worry,
you'll do it." So, you know, with Frank, he
has a certain way about him, I mean he just gets
people to do these things. Don: He just makes me
sick when he changes into a monster. Phyllis: Why?
Why does he make you sick? Don: Oh, can't you see
it how, how . . . ugly it is that, being that
monster? Oh, just, I can't stand it, I, I think
I'm gonna be sick, I have to vomit.
FZ: She just, she tells me she has to vomit, see.
She's trying to make me believe that it makes her
sick when he turns into a monster. Phyllis:
There's something about that that gets me so
nauseous, I don't know what it is. Look at that,
look at that. FZ: Yeah, but it's not true. Well,
you see, it gets her hot. Phyllis: There's
something so sexy about him. When he comes on that
stage, I get so hot just looking at him drinking
that, that smoke stuff, I don't know what it is. I
don't even care if he turns into a monster, I love
it . . . Don: Oh dear! Phyllis: Look at that, oh
him with the cape, but he doesn't, he walks away.
It's such a hot move and he, he's so terrific when
he goes back to that gong, oh, that's so nice . .
. Boy, I hope no one ever finds out I love it so
much, that hot monster . . . oh, ooh . . . Don:
You're really good at those dials, baby. You're
the most manipulating person I've ever seen.
Phyllis: I don't like to be called manipulating,
that's for sure, but I like to think of myself as
being hot. FZ: She gets hot. And then she runs
into the toilet, and she stands in front of the
mirror and she makes faces to herself so she can
turn into a monster. Isn't it cute? That's right,
then, when she does that, and she's having a
fantasy that she's turning into a monster, the
monster comes out of the toilet from behind her.
9:30
Phyllis: Oh . . . a little lower, please. Don: How
do you work all those controls in there? That's
really fantastic . . . Phyllis: Oh, it's nothing.
Don: All of those buttons and switches . . .
Phyllis: It's nothing. Look, look what's going on
there! Oh . . . oh, wow, this . . . Don: I just
can't see how a girl could do all that. Phyllis:
Oh, now with the, the Women's Liberation Front we
can do anything, you're kidding? Oh . . . oh! It's
so good! Don: This girl obviously has some sort of
demented problem in where she, she likes uh,
monsters that drink foamy vile liquid and uh
transform. It must be some uh, connection in her
past, in her childhood of something. Maybe her
father didn't demonstrate enough uh, affection for
her. It's a . . . Phyllis: Oh . . . it's been so
long . . . Don: Tell me, did your father
demonstrate any affection for you? Phyllis: I've
been watching you on the screen for four weeks . .
. Finally, my monster . . . Is it real? Is it
really you? Oh that feels, oh, monster, can I have
a bite off of your apple? Don: Mm . . . I think
that uh . . . Phyllis: It's so nice to be here
with a monster finally . . . Don: It must be uh,
her mother and father probably told her that she's
real ugly and awkward and dumb and everything . .
. Phyllis: It's a good apple, monster. Don: And so
she relates to people that are ugly, dumb and
awkward. Phyllis: Let me take off your hat so I
can really see what's happening underneath there.
Just what I thought, a monster head. Don: You'll
find this is quite common in uh, today's society
Phyllis: It's like Adam and Eve and the apple . .
. Finally, here's my monster . . . after all this
time . . . Don: That's why monster movies are so
popular, you know? Phyllis: I'd waited and waited
. . . Don: D'you know how many a monster movie
costs to make? Phyllis: And there he is, he's
right here. Don: Monster movies really cost a lot
of money. Phyllis: Sitting with me, I can't
believe it! Is it really you, monster? Don: And
our young society today goes to all these monster
movies and they see them on television night after
night. Phyllis: It's so terrific to be with the
monster. Don: We're raising a new generation of
monster lovers. Phyllis: I've been waiting so long
for the monster . . . Maybe this'll be the real
thing.
12:20
Don: He's changing into a monster! You should see
this! God, I get so hot! Aynsley: Would you like a
quick vibrator? Now you've ruined the whole thing
Carl: Have I? I'll take one down! Aynsley: Oh,
cheers . . . Carl: I thought you get the walking
four balls. Aynsley: No no . . . Carl: It's
difficult to walk on three. Don: I'm using the
chicken to measure it. Carl: Don? Don: I'm using
the chicken to measure it. Aynsley: Charles.
Phyllis: Aynsley Dunbar, who's playing with Frank
now, this real English popstar, very attractive
guy, and he's like into a whole groupie thing with
whips and things, don't ask me, and Frank got this
great idea, actually he gets this great idea for
me, to have Aynsley in the Hollywood Ranch Market,
which we just did last night, hit him with toilet
brushes. It's, it's a little dumb but I went along
with it, you know, what else are you gonna do?
You're getting paid and uh, you do these things.
13:19
Phyllis: Cleanser . . . cleanser . . . cleanser .
. . cleanser . . . cleanser . . . Aynsley: Hello,
there! Phyllis: Cleanser . . . cleanser . . .
Aynsley: Say, could you do me a favour? Could you
beat me with a toilet brush? Phyllis: Beat you
with a toilet brush? Aynsley: Shhh . . . someone
might hear . . . yes, beat me with a toilet brush.
Phyllis: What's your name? Aynsley: Ah, hello, my
name is Aynsley Dunbar and I, I'm very interested
in whips and canes, etc. I'm gonna fill, fill you
in about uh, my background. FZ: Are you absolutely
serious about this? You really like whips and
canes? Aynsley: Oh yeah, yeah. FZ: And you like--?
Aynsley: I didn't have too much chance to use 'em
here, as yet, because it's, you know the screams
and that, would most likely wake the kids up! No,
actually I'm moving on though to toilet brushes
and things, 'cause I think they'll be coming in
this year . . . definitely. Phyllis: You want me
to beat you with the toilet brush? Aynsley: Yes.
Phyllis: I mean like uh, I'm ready!
14:37
Phyllis: You know, I'll tell you something, I find
myself saying, "I'm ready," you know,
and like, I slap my face when I'm saying,
"I'm ready," because it's like uh, in
the house I'm saying, "I'm ready," you
know? And . . . there has to be a limit.
Phyllis: That's a whip, I guessed right, you know
I saw this handle sticking up here and I like, I,
I guessed it right on first, you know? Like I know
. . . FZ: Beat him while you're talking. Phyllis:
You know like . . . I tell you something. I hope
it's not getting your kidney or anything like
that. Aynsley: Oh look, keep, keep, just keep it
high, just keep it high. Phyllis: You know what I
mean? I got worried about those things, I got . .
. you know I'm humane, Aquarius and all this . . .
Aynsley: That's great . . . that's. . . Phyllis:
Venus is arising, you know, I'm humane. Aynsley:
Just keep it high. Oh, love it, yeah, right.
Phyllis: Uhm . . . well, let's see . . . FZ: Ask
him, "Does it get you hot?" Phyllis: Is
it getting you hot? Aynsley: Oh, maybe it would do
if I had another 'bout fifteen people.
15:20
Don: I know what gets you hot. Hamburgers get you
hot, 'cause I picked you up in the pool hall!
Phyllis: You don't know what gets me hot, you
don't have the faintest idea what gets me hot!
Don: Sure! Hamburgers! Look at this . . . Phyllis:
I can't take it . . . Don: See that? Phyllis: I
can't take it . . . oh, God, that hamburger! Don:
But you don't know what gets me hot. Phyllis: I'd
bet I know what gets you hot. Sticks, sticks on
your body on a table get you hot. Don: I'm getting
hot! . . . When I was drinking the potion . . .
and that hat and that cape and everything . . .
just incredible . . . I'd . . . wonder what it's
like to, to change into a monster . . . it must be
really great. Phyllis: It's just so wonderful.
Give me a bite of the apple there . . . Mmm, oh,
my monster! Oh, that's so terr-- Oh! I love that,
when a monster does that, mm . . . Well, I've just
been thinking, monster, we can take rides in the
country in the Volkswagen . . . and, my monster,
you're feeling me up, my monster. FZ: It does get
you hot. Phyllis: Well . . . it doesn't get me
hot. FZ: I saw you laying on the floor in the
corner with him! Phyllis: I, it wasn't me laying
in the corner! That was, that wasn't me! FZ: Ha ha
. . . Who was it? Phyllis: That was Sheba! It
wasn't me! FZ: Who is Sheba? Ha ha! Phyllis: Sheba
is the one that's in love with Don.
17:09
Don: And why, why do you like monsters? Phyllis:
It's, it's not their looks, it's the intellectual
thing that comes across, you know, you could tell
that, I, looks aren't important to me, it's
something about the intelligence. When you mix
that potion, you know when I've seen you mix that
potion, I don't know, it's the intellectual way I
get hot. Don: Yeah, but what causes this? Phyllis:
You know what I mean? Don: I mean, well . . .
Phyllis: It's, it's hotness.
17:39
Phyllis: It used to be very, it was really nice
and quiet in this place, that's why I came here,
because of the feeling like, like a place to get
away from things, and now what's going on, it's
like all noise and . . . I don't know, it doesn't
. . . wherever you go nowadays it's the same
thing, all these guys they're so disgusting, I
can't stand it . . . Don: Look, anybody . . .
anybody sitting here? Phyllis: No! Go right ahead,
sit down! Don: Thanks. Anybody drinking this beer
in here? Phyllis: No, I don't know what the
bartender . . . he just left it there, I don't
know what's going on . . . Don: My name is Biff
[ Letras de Canciones encontraron en es.mp3lyrics.org/OsTD ]
Debris. Phyllis: Oh, hi! Sheba Flieschman. Don:
How d'you do? Phyllis: So and uh, your name is
Biff Debris. Don: Yeah. Phyllis: You know, funny
thing, if we got married my name would be Sheba
DeBiff. Don: My name is Biff Debris, not Debris
DeBiff. Phyllis: Debris? Don: Yeah. Phyllis: Biff
Debris . . . well, I'll tell you something, I once
knew someone whose name was Dubois. It, it sort of
sounds like Debris, you know what I mean? Like, is
that French, or what? Don: Well, actually I'm part
Mohawk and part Norwegian. Phyllis: Excuse me. Is
the hamburger ready yet? Don: What sign are you?
Phyllis: Uh, I'm Aquarius with Venus rising on my
past. Don: Really? Phyllis: Yeah. It's really good
sign because it's the Aquarian age now, you know?
And like, it's all coming together. You know what
I mean by coming together? Don: Yeah. Phyllis: I
think since I came from New York, you know, I'm
really . . . Don: Are you from New York? Phyllis:
Yeah, you can't tell! Huh? Don: No . . . Phyllis:
I tell you something, so it really means that I'm
losing my accent, you know, because the other day
I was talking to someone and they couldn't guess
either, well, I asked them, I said to them,
"Where do you think I'm from?" And you
know they said, they said, "New Jersey,"
you know, so, and New Jersey accent is really
completely different, you know? Like, it depends
so, if you come from Patterson, it's different
from Trenton and Orange County, but you know, I
say "Orange" like this,
"Orange," 'cause that's in California
they say, "Orange," you know? Don:
What's the, what's the matter with uh, Debris?
Phyllis: That's one thing I stayed away from. Don:
Alright, you're free . . . Phyllis: I think that
you can really be high on your own intellectual
stratification. Don: Hamburgers. Phyllis: Don't
say hamburgers, it gets me so hot . . . Don: But
you don't know what gets me hot, you see . . .
Phyllis: I know what gets you hot! Don: No, no . .
. Phyllis: I saw it in the pool hall Don: You saw
that? Phyllis: Yeah! Don: That isn't what does it,
you see. It really isn't. Phyllis: Well, well,
what is it? You know, like if it's not that, then
what is it? Don: Well . . . Phyllis: Well, don't
be embarrassed! You can tell me, you know? Like
I'm . . . Don: Showers. Phyllis: Showers? Don:
Showers. Phyllis: Well, okay, you know, I can go
see that, I can see, I can understand showers.
Don: Not, not nude showers. Phyllis: What you mean
not nude showers? Don: It's gotta be a special
shower, you know. Phyllis: What kind of shower?
Don: With these special clothes on it. Phyllis:
You mean, you wear clothes when you . . . ? Don:
These clothes! These are the clothes . . .
Phyllis: These are the clothes that you . . . ?
Don: Right here . . . Phyllis: There are clothes
in there for me for the shower?
20:47
Phyllis: Say he devised this plan, this is how
this clothes and the shower thing all came by,
because I was too embarrassed to stand in the
shower. First roll, you know, I'm not gonna be
standing naked but, the whole thing's taking out,
so I figured, "Okay, I'll wear dungarees and
a shirt." And, and anyway to tell you the
truth I think it's sexier because, you see like
just a little outline . . . tiny little bit, you
know, like, poinnnng!
Phyllis: I don't understand it, but it's like . .
. Don: I mean . . . Phyllis: It's your trip, man!
You know? Like, it's alright with me, you know? I
don't care. Don: And this children's belt with the
little holes in it. Look at those pants! Phyllis:
Ooh, but what has this . . . do with the holes! I
mean, you know, like I hope they fit up. Don:
It'll be good . . . Phyllis: You know, like, okay,
I'll try, I don't care, I'll try anything!
21:26
FZ: Hi, Phyllis, why don't you want to take your
clothes off with the monster? Phyllis: Because I'm
embarrassed to. FZ: What's there to be embarrassed
about? Phyllis: Well, I've never done that before,
and I don't wanna do it now! FZ: But why don't you
wanna do it? Phyllis: I'd rather not. There's no
reason, I'd just rather not. FZ: But what's the
matter? You got an ugly body? Phyllis: No, I have
a great body. I just don't wanna do it. FZ: But
why don't you wanna do it if you've got a great
body? Don't you wanna share it with the world?
Phyllis: No, I don't wanna share it with the
world.
Phyllis: So I did it, and it was, I tell you, I
was getting hot, see my shirt?
Phyllis: I'm ready! I got the shirt, I got the
pants, and I got the belt with that little yellow
holes, you know? And I'm hot! Don: And I got the
bun and the hamburger and the relish and the
orange and I've got my clothes off and I'm hot!
Phyllis: Oh, come on! Don: You know how many times
we . . . ? I go down to Mr. Pocket three times a
week, trying to find somebody that'll wear these
clothes in the shower. Phyllis: How do they look
on me? Don: Oh . . . Phyllis: You like it? Don:
They're great, you know. I had those clothes in
the refrigerator for about two months now.
Phyllis: Where is the hamburger? Just give me a
bite, mmh . . . it's so great, you don't meet guys
. . . Don: Oh, it's disgusting . . . Phyllis: You
don't meet guys who get you off with hamburgers,
I'm saying I'm really happy that mmmm . . . Don:
Oh, the two of us really make a great couple!
Phyllis: I know, me with my clean clothes and the
hamburger and everything like that, well, you
know, we can go places. Don: Yeah. Phyllis: You
want me to wash your hair? While you, just hold
the hamburger first, you know, while I wash your
hair . . . Don: Do you want me to wash it to you?
Phyllis: Well, I don't know, I wasn't planning on
it, it's alright, you can wash my back . . . mm,
so nice the shower . . . Don: I can't bear it.
Phyllis: Especially, especially, especially if you
. . . Don: Some people are really weird. Phyllis:
Pull it on my back, just a little bit, it won't,
it won't hurt, just a little bit over there, this
side, it's terrific, with the hamburger.
23:21
Phyllis: Hamburger meat . . . Hhhh . . . Oh . . .
FZ: Wouldn't that be better if you had your
clothes off then you can uh, enforce him on your
arms? Phyllis: No, I . . . don't need my clothes
off, I can get the gratification that I want just
like this.
Phyllis: Oh, doesn't that feel good, oh, it's so
great. I'm so glad that I met you today . . . Don:
Mmmm . . . Phyllis: And this hamburger . . . Don:
Do you mind if I rub some of this in your hair?
Phyllis: Oh I don't mind, let me just take out
that little thing here, mmm . . . Don: Oh, boy . .
. Phyllis: A little bit, wait, it's, but I don't
know, do you have cream rinse here? . . . this
strip I won't be able to . . . Don: Cream rinse?
Phyllis: Yeah . . . 'cause I . . . Don: Eugh!
Phyllis: I won't be, let me see how it feels with
the soap. FZ: Whi-whi-which parts get you the
hottest that can be rushed with the hamburger?
Phyllis: Well I think uh . . . what part! Don: Oh,
I love this with hamburgers under the clothes.
24:12
Don: You're getting hot, come on. Phyllis: Oh, am
I hot, over this hamburger! Oh, I think of my uh .
. . Don: For a hundred dollars you're getting hot.
Phyllis: Oh, am I hot! I'm so hot! Hhh . . . I'm
so hot from this hamburger, oh . . . FZ: Get hot!
Phyllis: I'm so hot! FZ: Under, under . . . Ha ha
ha ha! Don: Undulate. FZ: Look! Don: You . . .
it's getting better. Phyllis: Where's the
hamburger? Just . . . those . . . FZ: Hamburgers
with soap are good. Phyllis: Ha-a . . . let me
take a little bite, mmm . . . delicious! Let me
put it in here so I don't loose it. I don't wanna
in case I wanna little piece after, could you do
my back? Don: Oh yeah . . . Phyllis: Underneath
the shirt, don't be bashful, I, oh, I know it
makes you hot, like if you keep . . . Don: Yeah, I
like the shirt better. I'll wash the shirt.
Phyllis: Oh, let me take a little bit of the
hamburger FZ: Ha ha! Phyllis: You know, the last
guy that I was with he just had Ground Choc, you
know what Ground Choc tastes like in the shower,
man . . . FZ: Ha ha ha ha! Don: Oh . . . Phyllis:
This is odd meat, where did you get this? FZ: Ha
ha ha! Phyllis: Just like the health food stuff,
are you a health food person? You know, like . . .
Don: No, I am Uncle Meat! Phyllis: You are Uncle
Meat?
25:24
Phyllis: And because you're the main man with the
burgers . . . FZ: "And the burger's my
trip." Phyllis: And the burger's my trip and
is such a groove, I wanna show my appreciation and
I wanna clean your bathroom . . . the cleanser . .
. FZ: "I am going to the Hollywood Ranch . .
. " Phyllis: I'm going to the Hollywood Ranch
Market and I'm gonna buy the cleanser. Don: And
because you have worn the clothes . . . Phyllis:
Cleanser . . . Don: That got me hot, the shirt . .
. Phyllis: Cleanser . . . Don: The pants and the
little brown belt, children's belt with the holes
in it . . . Phyllis: Cleanser . . . Don: I will .
. . Phyllis: Cleanser . . . Don: Accept your offer
to go to the Hollywood Ranch Market . . . Phyllis:
Cleanser . . . Don: And get the cleanser and clean
my bathroom.
26:06
Janet: He's from that group Cleanser. He looks
pretty kinky. Too bad we didn't have our garters
on. Janet & Lucy: EEEEEEEUH! Janet: Oh, what
do you expect from work in this joint. Lucy: Ooh
Janet, he has a vibrator! Now, ooh . . . Eeeuhh!
Ha ha ha! Ah . . . ah . . . aaaaaaAAAAH! Ooh wha .
. . ooh! Hhh . . . aaahhh . . .
26:44
Don: We're coming to the beginning of a new era at
the motel, where we have been working secretly on
a new composition in the back room, in our secret
chambers. 'Cause everything is secret. We're
trying to get the secret karma change for the
whole world, you see, like this whole karma thing,
it's really what's causing all the problems, so we
have to get a composition and, I'm sure that it's
going to be a hit single, because everyone is
going out and buying our new hit single, for this
group that uh . . . FZ: "You remember our
other single 'The Bun'?" Don: Yeah, you
remember our other single, "The Bun"?
See, this, this was our last composition . . .
Aynsley: Plugging it in . . . Don: And uh, it was
pretty hard to play because uh, some of the
members of the group couldn't read music, you see?
But we got it all straightened out and, some of
them quit and everything but . . . Aynsley?: A few
holes in the Brothers . . . Don: Uh, with our new
arrangement we really hope to do big things, you
know? Like we hope to change every single person's
karma and that in turn will change and upgrade all
the ecology problems, all the polution and all the
air and everything, you know? And this right here
is the composition I was speaking of and uh, this
is the guitar part, this is the vocal, this is the
bass part, and this little section over here could
be for the dancer, but she keeps quitting all the
time so we don't really know uh, if she's gonna be
in it which she is now or just take it out like
that. Now, it's very difficult to compose this
type of thing, because like, the slightest
movement that you can make of one single article
could define whether it's underground or real
commercial, see? If we put the sock over here it's
more commercial than if it were over here, then
it's real underground, you understand? So we take
you now to the motel, where the group is deep in .
. . just deep.
28:56
Motorhead: . . . straightest member is the writer,
you know what I . . . Don: Hey, listen you guys, I
would like just . . . Meredith: These guys can
work together. Don: Talk about the arrangement
here Aynsley: How about that new drum solo you
just worked out? Don: I've got a new composition.
Meredith: It's rhythmic, huh? Motorhead: Now
that's beautiful. Don: Listen . . . Silence,
fools! . . . SILENCE, FOOLS! Don't you believe in
progress? Carl: I'm using the chicken to measure
it. FZ?: Take that progress and stick it under a
rock! Carl: I'm using the chicken to measure it .
. . I'm using the chicken to measure it . . . I'm
using the chicken to measure it . . . I'm using
the chicken to measure it . . . I'm using the
chicken to measure it . . . I'm using the chicken
to measure it . . . I'm using the chicken to
measure it. FZ: What are you doing with the
chicken? Carl: I'm using the chicken to measure
it. FZ: What are you doing with the chicken? Carl:
I'm using the chicken to measure it. Motorhead:
Outta site! That's outta site! Meredith: That's
beautiful! FZ: What are you doing with the
chicken? Carl: I'm using . . . Don: That's what we
need for our new song. Meredith: That was a good
composition! Motorhead: We got it! Aynsley: Can
you write one like that then? Don: I did! Well . .
. Ray?: You would? I mean . . . Don: At last
night, that's . . . Ray: That's when he starts in
with the guitar . . . ? Don: Now look . . . Ray:
Then he comes in with his guitar solo? Don: You
guys, do you see this over here? Ray: Why does he
have this? Don: Can you see this over here? This
is the new composition that we're going to make a
hit single with. Aynsley: What's it called,
"Junk Shuffle"? Don: No . . . Ray:
"Junkyard." Aynsley: What's it called?
Carl: I'm using the chicken to measure it. FZ:
It's called "We're using the chicken to
measure it." Carl: I'm using the chicken to
measure it. Don: Right, "We're using the
chicken to measure it." Well, I couldn't get
a chicken, I, all I got was . . . Motorhead: That
would be the title. Ray's got a chicken. Aynsley:
Yeah! Motorhead: You can use Ray's chicken to
measure it. Don: But uh . . . FZ: No, no, that's
part of the concept, you're using the chicken to
measure the pitch in? Aynsley: It's what I choose.
Don: Oh, I see, yeah, are we using the chicken to
measure it? Motorhead: Or drumming? Don: I'll show
you, this is . . . Ray: How about a sock?
Motorhead: I thought it was cooler. Don: This is
the guitar part, right here. Motorhead: Then let
me see . . . Aynsley: Pull her. Motorhead: It's
that what I play? That's my part. Don: That's your
part. Motorhead: Oh, that A . . . Don: And this is
a new concept. Motorhead: I can't learn that by
tomorrow, man, there's no way. Don: Tonight.
Motorhead: I can't learn it tonight! Don: Listen,
I got the time booked. Motorhead: I can't even . .
. Aynsley: Tonight? OW! Don: At the Hollywodd
Ranch Market tonight, man! Meredith: That's pretty
heavy, man. Aynsley: But tonight?! Meredith:
That's pretty heavy . . . Motorhead: My strings
are flat, my pickups are shot, do Herbie wouldn't
give us an advance so I can buy some new strings
and an amp? Don: Listen, I'll take care of
everything.
30:52
Don: You see, Countess, the problem is uh, it's
very hard to talk about but, the guys need
equipment, you know like he needs batteries and
uh, and, and uh, needs strings for his guitar, you
know? And, and some of the electronic equipment
needs boosting and uh, we have a good prog and
everything, you know? I just wanted to find out if
we could get any awr . . . nng . . . gnn . . . Do
you have a pencil and a paper? Uh huh . . . thanks
. . . Francesca: Royalties? Don: GNG!
MMnnnngrgGGL! Sorry, would you mind not using that
word? It's a . . . Francesca: Who cares about
royalties? Don: Grrah! Francesca: Look, I've seen
everybody around, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones,
Arthur Brown, and his fire and his head . . . Oh,
man, I've never got so hot as long, I've ever got
so hot until I started to, to use the chicken head
to measure it with it.
32:25
Guy From Alabama: We must say it in Alabama
language, man, I can't understand. Another
"Guy From Alabama": Playing that kind of
music and eating meat, you'll never . . . Aynsley:
I say . . . I say . . . Guy From Alabama:
(unintelligible shouting) Aynsley: I say, old boy,
you speak english? Guy From Alabama: Hey man, you
got any peas or beans or anything like that?
32:38
Don: You have to admit this is different.
Motorhead: Oh I hate . . . that's a drum, that's
gotta be a drum. Don: I mean . . . I know what
it's like, to me the idea of being commercial is
doing something different. Meredith: Bet that
one's a heavy one . . . Carl: The way they feed .
. . Don: You know? Something people can . . . can
. . . Carl: WAH! Don: It's not the same old thing.
Aynsley: Hey, but that, that isn't a . . .
Meredith: Have to practise . . . Aynsley: No!
Carl: WAH! Don: NO! Motorhead: Look out! Ray: Oh .
. . Don: That's it, Ray . . . Motorhead: Chicken's
in the . . . Don: Now, use the chicken to measure
it. Motorhead: Chicken's in the . . . Aynsley:
Biff, man, how does that fit into the part, though
. . . heavy like that . . . Meredith: And what is
after into that my part there? Don: This is the
music. Meredith: Where? where? Don: This, the
whole thing is the music. Meredith: Ah, but how
does that one fit into all . . . Aynsley: But
there's no head, man. Meredith: But how does that
fit into all that? Aynsley: Oh yeah, there's . . .
Ray: Are you using a chicken to measure it?
Meredith: What's the concept of this? Motorhead:
There's no way we can play it. Meredith: What's
the concept of this number? Don: Look, look . . .
Motorhead: Not by tonight, man! It can't be done.
Aynsley: Let me . . . anyway, man, I'm going out
tonight, you know, I've got a few chicks to meet.
Motorhead: I'm going to hear the Fudge. Don: You
guys, if you wanna make a hit single and I mean, a
hit single. Aynsley: Yeah, but all I'm saying is
as long as you pay us well, I just don't wanna
know. Don: Well, you'll get royalties. Motorhead:
You gotta get some royalties, man! Aynsley:
Royalties? Don: Listen, you can't . . . Ray: A
monster! Phyllis: I'm wet . . . hamburger . . .
Meredith: This is turning too confusing, I just
can't understand what all this is about, it's so
confusing! Phyllis: My monster! Don: WARrrGH!
Phyllis: My monster! I'm ready! I got the pants, I
got the shirt, I got the belt with the little
yellow holes!
33:46
Phyllis: I can't get enough of that stuff, mmm!
FZ: "We're coming to the beginning of a new
era, at the motel." Phyllis: Look at this
over there, look . . . mmm mm . . . Don: We're
coming to the beginning of a new era at the motel,
we have been working secretly . . . Phyllis:
Obviusly still, still the best. Don: . . .on a new
composition in the back room . . . Phyllis: I love
when he always did that . . . Don: . . . in our
secret chambers. Phyllis: Then changed into . . .
I remember that . . . Don: 'Cause everything is
secret. Phyllis: For twelve years he's still
working on the same song, I don't know what I'm
gonna do. Don: We're trying to get the secret
karma change for the whole world. Phyllis: Still
kinda get that "The Bun" thing. I gotta
stop this, it's not good anymore. Don: You see,
like this whole karma thing, it's really what's
causing all the problems. Phyllis: Because after
all we've got kids now. Don: So we have to get a
composition. Phyllis: And we can't, he can't do
this anymore, it's another whole life. Don: And,
I'm sure that it's going to be a hit single.
Phyllis: But, I can't help it, I mean he's
irresistible. The guy is irresistible. Don:
Because everyone is going out and buying our new
hit single, for this group that uh . . . Phyllis:
Look at that face, over there . . . FZ: "You
remember our other single 'The Bun'?" Don:
Yeah, you rem-- Phyllis: Look at that, right that,
right there . . . mmm . . . Don: Our other single,
"The Bun"? See, this, this was our last
composition . . . Phyllis: Oh, God! Oh, I remember
that too . . . yeah . . . Don: And uh, it was
pretty hard to play because uh . . . Phyllis: Look
at this, when he did that at the fare . . . Don:
Some of the members of the group couldn't read
music, you see? Phyllis: No . . . it's better,
I'll tell you something . . . Don: But we got it
all straightened out. Phyllis: I don't know, I
have to think about this, 'cause I gotta tell him.
Ah! I'll go back! I can't be bother 'cause my mind
it's too, it's too crazy, it's going, it's driving
me nuts already, I have to think about work, I
have to think about him, I have to think about . .
. Stumuk: Maybe I oughta face it, after twelve
years "The Bun" just isn't a hit. Maybe
I'm approaching it wrong. Look at him, a musician,
a natural musician. This Motorcity was a serious
little boy. Liked to pull down the shades before
helping her with the dishes. Massimo: And that's
why it didn't sell. Look at this . . . Phyllis:
Oh, look at that! I remember --let me stop that
and see how the fume was coming out of his mouth,
and the way the lips, the lips, so beautiful and
the hamburger . . . Massimo: Try to do something
like that. Stumuk: Like that? Massimo: Maledetto
figlio di puttana. FZ: He's on television set.
Massimo: E non cagarmi il cazzo. Stumuk: A non
cacarmil catzo. Massimo: 'Cause I have a big bunch
of minchia! Stumuk: A big bunch of minchia!
Phyllis: It's great you're learning Italian, I
love . . . That's what I want! More, a little
culture, it's enough already with "The
Bun"! Stumuk: I had, I had to change it. It
wasn't right. Massimo: These fucking things didn't
work, I don't know why. Maybe, can you see all
these little points, white points, on these
fucking things? You have to know that . . .
Stumuk: Can you see? Massimo: . . . all this stuff
. . . Stumuk: Everybody's using the chicken to
measure it with nowadays, even my kids! Massimo: .
. . come from my nose, and maybe people didn't
like it. Stumuk: No more the sock . . . Massimo:
And I just don't know why . . . Stumuk: But
"The Bun," the placement of "The
Bun." It has seeds. It's different. Massimo:
I just can't imagine why they didn't like these
balls that come from my nose, you know? This way,
tshh! And I spent a lot of years of my life to do
something like that, these fucking things, and it
didn't work. What can I say?
Guy From Alabama: Far fucking out! Far fucking
out!
Linda: Hee hee hee hee! Rodney: Ah! I can dig it!
Guy From Alabama: DONG! DONG! I mean dong, that's
what your minchia is! Aynsley: Your which? Guy
From Alabama: A minchia! Aynsley: You mean your
dick? Guy From Alabama: You put your minchia in
the stinky-a.
Massimo: And you know why? 'Cause I have a big
bunch of dick! Tengo una minchia tanta! And this
part of the lesson, I'm sorry, but you can't
learn, 'cause Mother Nature didn't make you
Italian.
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