Laika Badtimes Letras:
If you receive an e-mail with a subject of
"Badtimes", delete it immediately
WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous
e-mail virus yet.

It will re-write your hard drive. Not only that,
but it will scramble any disks that are even close
to your computer. It will recalibrate your
refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice
cream melts. It will demagnetize the strips on all
your credit cards, screw up the tracking on your
VCR and use subspace field harmonics to render any
CDs you try to play unreadable.

It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend your new phone
number. It will mix antifreeze into your fishtank.
It will drink all your beer and leave its socks
out on the coffee table when there's company
coming over. It will put a dead kitten in the back
pocket of your good suit and hide your car keys
when you are late for work.

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Badtimes will make you fall in love with a
penguin. It will give you nightmares about circus
midgets. It will pour sugar in your gas tank and
shave off both your eyebrows while dating your
current boy/girlfriend behind your back and
billing the dinner and hotel room to your Visa
card.

It will seduce your grandmother. It does not
matter if she is dead, such is the power of
Badtimes, it reaches out beyond the grave to sully
those things we hold most dear.

It moves your car randomly around parking lots so
you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will
leave libidinous messages on your boss's voice
mail in your voice!

It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and
terrifying to behold. It is also a rather
interesting shade of mauve.

Badtimes will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will
leave the toilet seat up. It will make a batch of
methamphetamine in your bathtub and then leave
bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to
chase high school kids with your new snowblower.
These are just a few of the signs. Be very, very
careful!
Letras: Badtimes Laika [final]